Quitting has felt like madness sometimes...

15 months and counting--no smokes. It hasn't been easy to quit, but I guess I am in a sizable minority regarding this. When I first quit, I thought I'd spend five weeks or a few months kicking the habit then I'd get back to my comfortable old routine just with out the smokes. Didn't work out like that. I discovered that I have a seemingly bottomless well of resistance to change!

And just when I think I've got a foothold on what it means to get on with life without the smokes, I find myself anxious and unfocused--not really wanting to smoke anymore, but "life" just doesn't seem quite right either.

The degree to which I sometimes miss my old life is somewhat discouraging. But I was a smoker since the age of 17, and I quit at the age of 54. I take solace in the fact that perhaps it is best to follow my dear mother's wisdom, 'Give it time." She always was right.

I imagine myself hoisting my spiritual sails...hoping for a good wind.